Motherhood, Materialism and Minimalism God’s Way.

My husband rolled his eyes at me for what seemed like the 100th time that month. I was feeling resentment towards him trying to micromanage every purchase I made.  I mean I worked too, I deserve to buy that new home decor item and to add to my children’s toy collection. I knew I was an impulse shopper but he was the cheapest man in the world who didn’t like to spend a cent on anything not useful.

We were not compatible in the finance department.

I started feeling guilty for every purchase I made and started hiding things I bought to avoid the argument that was bound to happen. I prayed that we would come to a compromise in this area of our marriage.  Everything else seemed wonderful, but this was awful

He slowly stopped commenting on my purchases and at first, I felt relief.  That compromise I was praying for was answered.  But then I felt the Holy Spirit convicting me.

He wasn’t the problem. He wasn’t the one not being a good steward of God’s money. It was me. It was me choosing Starbucks over supporting starving children.  It was me “forgetting” the tithe envelope so I had more money to spend at the home decor store next week.  It was me living for the world and comparing my “stuff” to my neighbours.  It was my sin.

One gives freely, yet grows all the richer; another withholds what he should give, and only suffers want. Proverbs 11:24

Once I finally came to the realization that I was the one that needed to change, I dropped to my knees and prayed. God, please take the desire to shop away.  Please help me be a good steward of your money. Please bless this business so we can pay off debt.  Please, Lord, I want to serve.  We are open to Your calling of missions but my spending habits are preventing that.  Please open doors and break down strongholds. Please restore our marriage in the area of finances. Please Lord.  I need your help.  I cannot do this without you.

I started looking at my house and at all my stuff and started feeling disgusted with myself.  I cannot believe how many dollars I threw away on material possessions and how much it had hindered not only my relationship with my husband but my relationship with the Lord.

I dove into the scriptures for the Lord’s teachings on how I can change this area of my life.

I started by just stopping going to stores. There was nothing I needed that God hadn’t already provided. I just needed to remove the temptation.

I then went room by room and decluttered, purged, donated and organized. I got rid of carload after carload of stuff. I felt free. I felt encouraged. I looked around my clean and decluttered home and could feel the Lord’s presence.

Then I asked for my husband’s forgiveness and apologized for all the stuff I had brought into our home and for the arguments that had caused.  He forgave me, and was so happy that God was working in my life in this area.

God was calling me to a more minimal life. A simple life without so many distractions, where I can really focus on Him.

A life where I stopped arguing with my kids about cleaning their overpacked room of toys. A life where my husband stopped worrying about my spending.

A life where we were paying off debt and fast and giving more.

A life where we were finally able to say yes to God’s call that we have been praying over for the last several years.

Money and possessions are mentioned in the bible over 800 times.  That indicates how passionate God is about our financial habits. Let’s dive in deeper into this topic.

We live in a culture of consumerism, and instant gratification and I think so many moms struggle with this. We want to look our best, have beautiful homes, and give our children a full life but I think we are misguided at how we do these things. I fell prey to this and it wasn’t til I really looked at what the Bible said about this, that I was able to make a change. We often look to the world and not the word and our social media culture is overwhelming and distracting! 

I come from the beauty industry, it used to be my world and I cared so much about things like hair and makeup but now I could care less. Sure I think it is important to take care of yourself and look put together but our media bombards us with messages all day long on how to be more beautiful. It becomes too much. Especially after we become moms and our bodies have changed and our priorities have shifted, we feel like we will never measure up to this impossible beauty standard.

Beauty is not about the external and spending lots of money on makeup and hair and clothes.

Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. 1 Peter 3: 3-4

God wants us to be hospitable but that doesn’t mean spending a ton of money on a perfect tablescape. He wants us to be focused on Him and sharing that hospitality with others, having Christian fellowship.

As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me! “Martha, Martha” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her. Luke 10:38-41

God wants us to love our children but not by spoiling them with toys and fancy vacations.

These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.  Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates. Deuteronomy 6: 6-9

God wants us to live simply. God wants us to be focused on him.  God wants us to free up our time, declutter our lives and live in His word.

Better a little with the fear of the Lord than great wealth with turmoil. Proverbs 15:16

God will provide all our needs. We need to let go and give him the reins. Let Him be in control of our lives. When we choose to live with less and give more, God will bless us. When we seek the Lord and fear the Lord He will show us his abundant love.

Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?  Matthew 6:25-27

We get caught up in stuff and become discontent when we cannot afford something we want. But when we live with less and choose joy and contentment the Lord gives us strength and peace.

I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength.  Philippians 4:11-13

 Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, never will I leave you, never will I forsake you.   Hebrews 13:5

And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19

I want to encourage you in your motherhood. Focus on God first, search the scriptures for what he says about money and materialism and live your motherhood in a way that honours the Lord.

For me, this sparked a huge minimalism journey and I haved shared how I did this and the benefits I have seen on my youtube channel.
I want to end this post by saying stuff is not bad, but when that becomes your focus and starts hindering your life, then I think it is time to reassess your priorities.
Do you feel like you are drowning in housework? Overwhelmed by the stuff around you? Mental clutter that fogs your brain. Do you almost feel paralyzed by your to-do list?
I can almost guarantee you this is a “too much stuff problem”
Family minimalism is awesome and life-changing, I encourage you to give it a try.
Minimalism does not mean white walls and empty shelves. There is a difference between minimalism aesthetic and the real meaning of minimalism which is living with less for the sake of more. It means getting rid of things we don’t find GREAT joy in or that are USEFUL to open up more space and time to focus on what really matters.

Christ, our relationships and meaningful work or experiences.

Remember comparison is the thief of joy.

I encourage you to write down your top three important things in your life. I guarantee it’s not your designer purse or your best friends fancy living room set.
Start filtering your life and your ‘stuff’ through your top three priorities and lose the rest. Remove the worldly distractions and focus on what God says about our stuff.

In the upcoming episodes I am interviewing some amazing mamas who believe and teach just this. I am excited for you to learn more about minimalism and managing the chaos in our homes, so we can be living out our motherhoods in a way that is honoring to the Lord.

You won’t want to miss the next couple of episodes!

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